Today I have some comments on New Year’s Resolutions. Do you make them? And, if you do, how does that work for you? I view Resolutions in the same light as diets: Something to go “on”, only to end up discouraged and go “off”. Why do we do that?
For people who strive to lose weight, only to struggle from year to year to year, they often live in the land of ‘someday’, rather than in TODAY. The only ‘today’ that they experience is when they wake up and promise themselves that “today I will do better”…
But what happens when they are NOT ‘better’? Often they end the day as all the previous days – feeling a sense of failure. They started out great, but…. And then they go to bed again feeling guilty!
Isn’t this the same thing that happens with Resolutions?
Why not do something different? And here I’m going to diverge into two separate topics: Health and business, again.
Business is the easier topic, actually. This is where goals can be made and action plans created. Starting something new in the New Year is a great time! But it doesn’t have to be a Resolution… beyond maybe a Resolution that this year you’re going to make it REAL! So, for that business, sit down and write out what you would like to accomplish this year. If you’re just starting out, or in the THINKING stage, what minimum action will you take? If you already have a business, what new product, service or direction would you like to take it this year? It might be something as simple as cutting expenses or tracking income and expenses better! It might be something as challenging as moving in a new direction. Regardless, it does need to be written out on paper to help solidify your plans.
Health is a more challenging topic. As a health professional, I have spent years helping clients achieve their health and fitness goals. Many are successful, but some continue to feel challenged and unsuccessful. We discuss that topic of ‘one day’, with the focus of feeling better and living healthier. What we do NOT do, however, is discuss the option that it is OK to feel a sense of failure and fear that they may never ‘get there’. We view ‘today’ as something to get past, rather than something to actually live in and be ok with. We continue to encourage to think positive and investigate what holds them back from achieving that elusive goal of ideal health and weight. What if they were to really sit with where they are, right now, at this very weight or health condition. And what if we stopped trying to IMPROVE where they are for awhile? Instead, just trying to appreciate it for what it is. You know: “It is what it is”. It IS what it is, afterall! We can’t pretend it otherwise…
Why do I bring this up when I’m talking about Resolutions? Perhaps we should consider the concept of allowing people to accept what their life is like right now and stop focusing on the future until they have actually accepted their present situation. What if people were allowed to ‘wallow’ if necessary, and come to real grips with where they are right now? For health challenges, this makes sense. For business challenges, I still believe that setting goals and action plans help move us forward. But health is more personal and involves so many more emotions.
There are many successful people who still struggle with their weight! If you are one of them, I’m sure you’ve had some conversation with yourself about this. The two seem totally separate, somehow. But are they, really? What I often hear is, “I don’t have time.” Hm; there’s that time management issue, again!
But it’s more than a time management issue. It’s a self-care and self-acceptance issue. And it’s an attempt to put one aspect of life aside in favor of another. However, it’s been my experience that people, women especially, who struggle with their weight and health, no matter how successful they are in business still don’t feel successful.
What does success look like to you? And, instead of making a New Year’s Resolution, what can you do to start facing what you’ve tried to ignore and help yourself move into that person you ARE, rather than the person you want to BECOME.
Margie